Working and writing for Cobblestone Press,
I get to be home all day. My dirty little secret
is that I almost always have the television on,
and I watch way too many daytime talk shows. I
happen to love Steve Wilkos, Dr. Phil, and I dearly
miss Montel! I admit I don’t watch Oprah
much, but one show caught my attention: it was
about sex.
Yes, that’s right, Oprah was talking about
sex, with her guest being an actual, certified
sex therapist.
Being that I write erotic romance, this of course
snagged my interest. They discussed everything
from hormones to each individual body part. They
even had a diagram. (Kind of need to in order
to have my characters get what they need, right?)
What I found the most fascinating was the discussion
on Female Submission.
I write BDSM (Bondage and Discipline, Dominance
and Submission, Sadism and Masochism) because—well,
I still blame that on Madison Layle, my co-author,
because if she hadn’t written Owning Rachel,
chances are I never would have gone down that
dark path.
Okay, maybe I would have eventually gone there,
but Madi thrust it upon me, and I can’t
say I’m sorry. I do very much enjoy writing
it. But why do so many women—and men—love
reading it?
According to Oprah’s therapist, more than
60% of women have submission fantasies. It’s
the most common fantasy. The psychology behind
it, though, was the fascinating part.
Women run the world. We work outside the home,
we pay bills, we make sure all the kids are fed,
clothed, go to bed at a reasonable hour, and get
their homework done. We’re soccer moms who
are constantly on the go. We’re PTA presidents.
We run from place to place to place and must,
must, must keep everything and everyone in order
so that our lives don’t fall apart. We also
tend to keep our men in order, too. And, we’re
supposed to make sure they’re happy in the
bedroom, after we’re totally exhausted from
running the rest of the world all day.
Using myself as an example: My husband works
nights. Before he leaves for work, I make sure
he has a lunch packed, that he has his keys, his
clipboard, his cell phone, and some cash in case
he needs to get some coffee or a snack. Kind of
the same things I do for my daughter.
So why would women have submission fantasies?
Because they want to—need to—let go!
No responsibilities. Turn over all control to
the man, and let him deal with it.
There are the submission sexual fantasies…
He ties her up and sees to her pleasure. She doesn’t
have to think, to work, to worry. Let him do to
her what he wants, as long as the end result is
an earth-shattering orgasm that tilts her world
and lets her know she’s really the woman
he loves and desires. Sigh. Yeah… Definitely!
Then, going deeper into BDSM, there’s total
submission. A slave or pet. Turning over all control
to the man, 24/7/365.
Not something I could see myself doing, but it
sure is fun to write it, to imagine, to pretend
what it would be like to say, “I have no
more responsibility, and live only for my man.”
(Not for the control freaks of the world, of which
I’m a card-carrying member!) But, imagine
it for a day, or even an evening. Cook your man
a special supper, then bow down to his will and
let him control the night.
It’s worth a shot, right?
Thanks, Oprah, for the enlightenment.
Leanne Karella, also writing as Anna Leigh Keaton,
is a multi-published, best-selling and award-winning
author in both mainstream and erotic romance,
and is the Assistant Managing Editor for Cobblestone
Press, LLC. She strives to gift her readers with
heroes and heroines they can fall in love with
as deeply as she has, and story lines that will
keep them riveted from beginning to end. Visit
Leanne on the web:
www.leannekarella.com
www.annaleighkeaton.com
www.incognitoseries.com
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