What are your New Year's resolutions? To be
more productive, get in shape, be positive about
yourself and your work?
Most of us finish up a year by evaluating what
we've done and how we feel about it, even if only
in a vague, general way. And we start the new
year with dreams and all good intentions for making
them come true.
But when you finish up that new year, how many
of your dreams came true? Did you even remember
what those dreams were, as you progressed through
the year?
How can you do better?
By identifying your self-defeating behaviours,
and committing to concrete methods for defeating
them.
In January of 2004, several members of the Greater
Vancouver Chapter signed up for an online course
sponsored by the Kiss of Death Chapter of RWA,
and presented by Margie Lawson, called "Defeating
Self-Defeating Behaviors: Allow Writing Productivity
and Creativity to Soar." And in January of
2005, another group (including some repeaters)
did the same.
What did we learn?
For a number of us, some of the techniques were
things we'd already read/heard in books and courses
in psychology, time management and/or writing.
But for a lot of us, there were some new techniques,
plus a refresher on techniques we'd once learned
but were failing to apply. For a number of people,
there was an "aha" moment and/or a major
turnabout in attitude and approach.
I think we'd probably all say that not all techniques
resonated with us. Nor, I'm sure, would the instructor
expect them to. But most participants did come
away with something—often many things—of
value.
Part-way through the course, one person said
the biggest value to her was "the intentional
creating of mental space to do this type of work."
So, perhaps that's lesson number 1. If you want
to achieve something, you have to make a commitment.
Perhaps for you that means spending some money,
signing up for a course, and committing some time—not
just getting a book out of the library and hoping
you'll find time to read it before it's due back.
Note that the participant said "mental space."
That doesn't just mean carving an hour out of
the day and sitting in front of your computer,
it means making a mental commitment to identify
your problem areas and change them.
Lesson number 2 is to be honest with yourself
and identify your self-defeating behaviours. Are
they perfectionism, procrastination, negativity?
Feeling like you're a failure? All of the above,
and more?
Fine, maybe you already know your problem areas.
Likely, you've already tried to change them, and
found those bad habits are firmly entrenched.
Stubborn as they may be, you can defeat them—or
at least grapple them into submission.
The course provided numerous techniques and exercises.
Very briefly, some that particularly resonated
with GVC members included:
• Be positive. Defuse negative self-talk.
Work on controlling the stressors and negatives
in your life. Begin and end the day with positive
thoughts: what's going to be (or was) good about
this day, and about yourself in this day? Some
days it's tough, but there's always something—even
if it's the sunshine out your office window, a
nice cup of tea, a co-worker's kind word, your
own flexibility and resilience in coping with
a problem, five minutes with a good book, or climbing
under the covers at the end of a truly rotten
day.
• Set goals: yearly, monthly, weekly and
daily. Make them concrete and realistic, but don't
be too slack on yourself – challenge yourself
a bit. Divide your immediate goals list into two
parts: the top priorities that should be achievable,
and the "superstar" goals that you'll
move on to if (and only if) you complete the first
set of goals. Monitor your progress toward your
goals, adjust if something unexpected requires
your attention, and at the end of the period (day,
week etc.), see how you did.
• Work with a career/change coach: When
you set your goals, report them to your coach.
At the end of each week (or each day, if that's
how you and your coach choose to work), report
on how you did. Your coach's role is not to chastise
you if you didn't complete all your goals, nor
to say "poor baby, tough day, you’ll
do better tomorrow." She/he is there to encourage
and to nudge. For some of us, simply having weekly
goals and knowing we'll have to report to our
coach is a huge motivator to get those goals completed.
I took the DSDBs (Defeating Self-Defeating Behaviors)
course in January of 2004. I reacted to many of
the tools and techniques with "oh yeah, been
doing that for years" or with "forget
it—no way will that work for me." But
I did incorporate weekly goal-setting and working
with a career coach (who is another writer, in
my local Chapter of RWA). A year later, I'm still
doing both those things because they've proved
hugely valuable.
Over the first year, my career coach and I added
something to our weekly goals list: we expanded
it beyond writing goals to incorporate everything
we want to achieve in that week (including work,
doctor appointments, family commitments, fitness,
etc.). After all, our writing takes place within
the framework of our entire lives, and we set
writing priorities bearing in mind all our other
priorities.
Now, when my coach and I look at our weekly goal
lists, we can keep the various aspects of our
lives in perspective, and in the appropriate balance
for the particular week. One week, the day job
and family commitments may simply have to be the
priority, and we adjust writing goals accordingly—and
can still feel good about accomplishing those
goals during a very busy week. We're being realistic
and positive, and continually reinforcing that
our writing is an important part of our lives.
I took the DSDBs course again in January of 2005.
What I came away with this time around was a desire
and commitment to take both a shorter-term and
a longer-term view with my goals. I still love
the weekly-goals process, but now I also have
a yearly-goals list. Well, okay, I did that last
year too, as part of the course, then forgot to
refer to it again. (Although, amazingly enough,
when I remembered it at the beginning of 2005,
I found I'd in fact accomplished almost everything
on it—so, maybe it was in the back of my
mind all along). This year, when I set weekly
goals, I refer to my yearly-goals list to make
sure I'm not losing focus on my longer-term goals.
Also, I'm paying more attention to the immediate,
short-term focus: I start each day with positive
thinking and a plan for that day, based on my
weekly goals. I end the day with a quick analysis
of how I did, and a bit more positive thinking.
Another thing I've added this year is putting
time estimates in my weekly goals list, then trying
to pay attention to how much time a particular
task actually takes. Most of us underestimate
how long things are going to take, and end up
not being able to achieve our goals because the
week didn't have enough hours. Tracking time helps
me learn to be better in my planning, and in evaluating
whether certain tasks are really worth the amount
of time I spend on them.
Three other people who took the course for the
second time this year had a similar experience
to mine. Different things resonated, and they
found new approaches and fresh motivation.
If we can all maintain the techniques and commitment
we learned in January, we're going to have a fantastic
writing year!
Susan Lyons is a member of the Greater Vancouver,
Vancouver Island and Kiss of Death Chapters of
RWA®.
Articles may be reprinted in RWA® chapter
newsletters, attributed to the Spotlight.
Non-RWA® newsletters may not reprint articles
without the permission of the authors.
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