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October 2003 Spotlight Featured Article

My Glamorous Transformation to a Pubbed Author
by Wendy Roberts

On August 8th at nine-thirty in the morning I was up to my elbows in turtle poop. My husband had taken three of our four children to golf lessons and I had decided to tackle the revolting and disgusting job of cleaning the aquarium. My three year old watched as our beloved turtle, Turdie, hissed and snapped his indignation at my attempts. Then the phone rang.

With cordless receiver tucked under my chin I answered with a curt Hello and kept on scrubbing away at stubborn turtle excrement. The voice on the other end of the phone, obviously hesitant after my abrupt greeting, asked if this was a good time to talk. I immediately thought that the person on the other end of the line was most definitely some saleswoman bent on bending my ear so I began to describe the revolting task I was undertaking in the removal of turtle waste. After a poignant pause, Kathryn Lye from Red Dress Ink introduced herself and I withdrew my hands from the filthy aquarium and babbled my apologies.

The editor proceeded to tell me that she liked my manuscript and I blathered that I was glad she liked it. Next she said that the other editors at Red Dress Ink also liked it and I prattled that I was glad they liked it too. There was a brief pause where I was waiting for the big BUT where she would say, we liked it BUT we don't feel it's right for RDI. No BUT came. Instead she said that they would like to make me an offer to purchase Cat's Pajamas.

I sputtered, blubbered, rambled and sobbed then apologized for crying and cried some more. Kathryn kindly assured me that she was used to that kind of reaction. Next she spilled details and I scribbled as fast as I could. Afterward I noticed my writing was unintelligible but I do remember some of the information she gave me. First they would send me a contract (oh my God!) and after I signed the contract they would send me a check (omigod, omigod!!). The next step would be some minor revisions and she needed to be sure that I could do those in less than 90 days. I laughed and told her, that I'd written the whole damn thing in six weeks so it wouldn't be a problem. She assured me that the changes would be very minor. RDI hoped to have my book on bookshelves either late 2004 or early 2005. Yes, I could use my real name but we'd need to come up with a new name for the book because Cat's Pajamas wouldn't work. I confessed to being title-challenged and she assured me that it was something we'd work on together. I babbled that I'd recently lost my critique partner and she said I didn't need a critique partner because I now had an editor. More tears. Many, many more tears.

After hanging up the phone I did a whooping hollering happy dance around the house that involved much screaming tangled with hysterical laughter. When my three year old asked what was wrong, I told him that mom just sold a book. His enthusiastic reaction, "Oh. Can I have some cranberry juice?" I shrieked, "Yes! From now on you get the real thing! No more generic cranberry juice for you!" He looked at me like I'd lost my mind. Which, in all fairness, was probably true.

I spent an hour phoning and emailing. Afterward, still with a goofy grin on my face, I returned to turtle poop detail. In the weeks that have followed I've scrubbed toilets and cleaned the garage.

In the end, simultaneously, nothing and everything had changed.

Wendy Roberts is a member of GVC.

Articles may be reprinted in RWA® chapter newsletters, attributed to the Spotlight. Non-RWA® newsletters may not reprint articles without the permission of the authors.

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This page was last updated October 21, 2003.